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SALT LAKE CITY—Tell Henry Billister your first child is on the way and he will recount the time eight kindergarteners got sick in the same half hour. Mention how terrible your year has been due to deaths in the family and Billister will keep things in perspective by telling you about the year of frequently expired milk.

For this Lincoln Elementary School custodian, there is not a single major life event he is unable to relate to a vomit removal story.

"You’re writing a story about me?” asked Billister when questioned about his worst vomit encounter. “Reminds me of the time a fourth grader lost his lunch in the gym and it looked like words. Not that crazy, really. Vomit can tell you things about life. It can speak to you.”

In fact, Billister says he looks at life much more clearly after his years removing piles of vomit. He even takes political matters to the hallway floors.

“I remember when John Kerry ran against George Bush in 2004,” said the 68-year-old janitor. “Well, sometimes vomit makes sense. You look at it and understand its composition. Other times you see a kid’s vomit and question how it came out of his mouth, what level of thinking led to him eating those things, and why he wants to invade Iraq.”

Perhaps the most applicable use for his vomit parables comes when advising his grandchildren about life.

Grandson Blake remembers many of the talks his grandfather has had with him. “I think it’s really gross how he talks about vomit all the time,” said the 17-year-old. “One time his stories made me sick, and now he uses that story as an example of how you can make people vomit with vomit stories.”

“Vomit guides him now,” said Billister of his grandson Blake. “He sees the insights it holds.”