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WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Bush vetoed a bill on Wednesday that would have given an extra 35 billion dollars over the next five years to fund the enrollment of 4.4 million more children in the State Children’s Health Insurance Program. Bush said he favored a plan that focuses on children looking within themselves and using the power of positive thought to avoid major ailments like cancer and minor illnesses.

About 72 percent of Americans supported the legislation that would have used increased cigarette tax to fund the program’s expansion.

“It’s sad,” said President Bush, “that only 28 percent of Americans still believe in positive thinking.”

Political analysts doubt it is Americans’ lack of positive thinking, but rather a soft spot for sick children whose families can not afford quality health care. “This is a simple matter,” said Peter Mellbock, Washington Reader political columnist. “It was all about giving poor children health insurance by raising cigarette taxes.”

But the White House disagrees, pointing out many of those poor children will be smoking cigarettes in the very near future. “Sure we can give them health coverage now,” said White House Press Secretary Dana Perino. “But it’s as if we would be stealing from them in two years.

“The president’s positive thought initiative is a creative plan that would keep many children from becoming sick through their own mind’s power, which will benefit them later in life.”

President Bush added he would never be where he is without positive thought. “You have to be able to believe in yourself at all times and will things to happen in your favor,” said Bush. “Even when you are faced with indisputable facts and a clearly appropriate strategy.”